Why are so many women working harder than ever but still underpaid?
Career strategist and former recruiter Tessa Grashuis joins me to unpack the hidden world of salary compression — what it is, how it shows up, and why it keeps talented professionals stuck.
We talk about the smartest ways to negotiate at the offer stage, advocate for yourself inside your current role, and push back on outdated systems without blowing up your career. Tessa also shares what really happens behind the scenes in hiring and why persistence matters more than a single yes or no.
If you’ve ever felt deflated asking for a raise or nervous about negotiating, this episode will give you both the insight and confidence to fight for what you deserve.
When it comes to pay, too many professionals, especially women, wait for recognition that rarely comes. They get caught in the trap of salary compression: when new hires come in making the same (or more) than loyal employees who’ve been there for years.
I recently sat down with career strategist and former recruiter Tessa Grashuis on to dig into this issue.
After a decade hiring more than 1,000 people at places like Zillow and fast-paced startups, Tessa has seen how companies handle compensation from the inside and how professionals can navigate the system without losing themselves in the process.
Here are the big lessons from our conversation.
What Salary Compression Really Looks Like
Salary compression happens when companies fail to adjust pay for existing employees while offering competitive salaries to new hires. Which means seasoned employees watch new team members walk in the door earning just as much (or more) for the same role.
It’s not rare. It’s not personal. It’s systemic. And it’s one of the reasons so many professionals feel undervalued, stuck, or tempted to walk away altogether.
The Best Time to Negotiate
Tessa’s first piece of advice: be proactive.
The strongest moment of leverage you’ll ever have is when you’re first offered a job.
At that stage, the company has already decided they want you. It’s far easier (and cheaper) for them to negotiate than to restart the entire hiring process.
In other words: that first offer is almost never final. In fact, Tessa shared that over 70% of employers expect candidates to negotiate. If you don’t, you’re likely leaving money on the table.
Why Negotiation Isn’t Greedy
Many professionals, especially women, hesitate to negotiate because they don’t want to appear greedy, ungrateful, or “difficult.” But from the recruiter’s perspective, negotiation is part of the process.
Tessa put it bluntly: she’s never had a hiring manager be shocked that a candidate asked for more. If anything, clear, confident negotiation signals that you understand your value and can advocate for yourself—skills most companies want in their leaders.
The key is preparation. Don’t hand over a vague range or say, “Whatever you think is fair.”
Instead, come with a clear number, backed by market research and specific evidence of the value you bring. And end with a simple question like: “Does that land with you?” It keeps the conversation open without over-explaining.
Building Your Case Inside Your Current Role
But what if you’re already in a job and realize you’re underpaid? That’s where self-advocacy comes in.
Tessa recommends gathering your own evidence. Every time you get specific praise, deliver early, or contribute measurable outcomes, document it. When raise or promotion conversations come around, you’ll have receipts.
Think about it from your manager’s perspective, it’s much easier for them to advocate on your behalf if you hand them a clear package of accomplishments tied to business results than if you simply say, “I’ve been working hard.”
Pushing Through the Discomfort
Self-advocacy isn’t always met with applause. In fact, Tessa shared a painful moment when a female mentor discouraged her from asking for a raise.
It stung, but it didn’t stop her. Over time, she kept asking, kept negotiating, and ultimately increased her salary by more than 100% through persistence and strategic moves.
Her takeaway? These conversations will always feel uncomfortable. They’re supposed to. The point isn’t to eliminate the discomfort; it’s to get stronger at moving through it.
Walking Away from Toxic Jobs
Finally, for anyone stuck in a toxic workplace, Tessa offered a reminder… the “devil you know” can feel safer, but it isn’t.
Fear of the unknown often keeps us in environments that are actively harming us.
But once you leave, you’ll see what was hidden before: that better does exist. Sometimes all it takes is one step out of the mess to realize you’re not the problem.
At the end of the day, self-advocacy is uncomfortable. But it’s also the skill that will protect your career, your livelihood, and your peace of mind.
To connect with Tessa:
Got thoughts or questions from this week’s episode? Drop them in the comments. I’d love to hear from you! 🫶
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I’m Tara Kermiet — leadership coach, burnout strategist, and host of The Balanced Badass Podcast®. I help high-achievers and corporate leaders design careers that are successful and sustainable.
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